How to Help Your Children Deal with the Effects of Domestic Violence

• Make time to give your child individual attention every day. Even a few minutes makes a big difference.

• Initiate conversation about the violence and let them know it is okay to talk about emotional or physical abuse they have seen or heard.

• Make sure to tell your children the violence is not their fault.

• Support your children in their range of feelings toward the abuser and do not “badmouth” your partner in front of the children.

• Tell them that abuse is wrong at any time.

• Encourage your children to be involved in community activities to help them feel less isolated, e.g. music lessons, school sports.

• Make and practice safety plans with your children.

• Use methods of discipline that are non-violent, e.g. grounding, time-out.

• Set loving, yet firm and consistent limits. This will help your children feel safe and know what to expect.

• Maintain consistent routines at home. This will help your children feel safe and know what to expect.

• Reduce your children’s exposure to violent toys, television, video games, etc.

• Talk with your teens about healthy relationships and sexuality.

• Take time out for yourself when you are feeling overwhelmed. Some examples are calling a friend, taking a bath, or writing in your journal.

• Give your children lots of love, kindness, and affection.