MYTH Violence is really only an isolated event. There isn't much of it happening.
REALITY One in every 15 relationships is currently experiencing the kind of violence that will send the victim to the hospital.
MYTH Domestic violence happens only to poor people and minorities. People who are battered are uneducated, unemployed, and from the lower economic level of society.
REALITY Battering occurs at all levels of society. Reports from police records, victim services, and academic studies show domestic violence exists equally in every socioeconomic group, regardless of race or culture, among the working and unemployed, the educated and the uneducated, regardless of race or socioeconomic level.
MYTH People “make their partners hit them” by “getting in their face.” They “ask for it.”
REALITY Every relationship has arguments and stress, but most people don't hit others when they become angry. An abuser has limited skills to deal with stress. NO ONE EVER DESERVES TO BE ABUSED!
MYTH The person actually enjoys the attention, needs the violence or is a perpetual victim.
REALITY They do not want to be hit. Abusers’ violence is their own responsibility.
MYTH The abuser is a sick or crazy monster, angry all the time.
REALITY An abuser can be passive, a “nice person,” generous to others and sensitive. Anyone can be an abuser.
MYTH Alcohol and drugs are the causes of violence.
REALITY Alcohol and drugs do not cause violence. But these substances can reduce ability to control behavior, and they apparently do increase the lethality of the violence. Furthermore, they offer batterers another excuse to evade responsibility for their behavior. Successful completion of a drug treatment program does not guarantee an end to battering.
MYTH A person will nag and run their mouth to the point that sometimes they need to be hit.
REALITY Nothing excuses abuse. No one “needs” to be assaulted with physical contact, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, or mental abuse. IT IS ILLEGAL! Growing evidence indicates that a victim does not provoke the attack. No one can force another to hit by his or her words. Everyone, including a batterer, is responsible for the choices he or she makes.
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